153 Comments
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Kate Mapother's avatar

Post menopausal woman reporting in to say I could not vaporize with my eyes, but I could immolate with body heat. Almost as good. This was worth the wait. You’re a gem, Crenshaw.

Shar L's avatar

Perimenopausal woman here and if I have to endure another decade of this I feel like I *will* be able to vaporize people with my eyes

Kirsty Anne's avatar

I had a Christian man (who of course didn’t preach or force his beliefs on anyone, god forbid) lecture me that there are men and women and that’s that. Adam and Eve and That Is All. Obviously I don’t remember asking his opinion.

I said that there was no way we could possibly know this, seeing as we used to “know” that the earth was flat and that smoking was great. Heeled shoes were invented for Persian men and now we see them as a “female” item. We actually don’t know anything for sure. Surely all we can do is be kind and let people be. It actually shut him up!

Erling Samuelsen's avatar

Hi Kirsty. You mention a few items that we believed were true, such as smoking being healthy and the earth being flat, and then likened them to the design of the sexes. The difference between these natural (although incorrect) observations and the design of male and female is the authority that the information comes from. Natural observations come from methods that are imperfect and people who make errors. The Bible, on the other hand, is the Word of God, and God tells us that He made male and female. I trust that what He says is truth.

Paul Crenshaw's avatar

Brother, do not come on my thread mansplaining what is, in fact, just your uneducated opinion.

Kirsty Anne's avatar

Sorry Erling, the Bible was written by imperfect men who make errors (and have agendas), so I don’t have to believe a single word of it.

Have a good day x

messianicdruid's avatar

Why does the Bible consistently speak against all the things that those in authority wish to do, if those in authority wrote it?

Kirsty Anne's avatar

can I ask who you think wrote it, if not people in authority at the time?

For the record I think faith is lovely, comforting, wonderful. It’s the lecturing of faith to others as if it’s Irrefutable Truth that I don’t like. It’s people using faith to tell others who they can be and who they can love and how they should live that I can’t bear.

messianicdruid's avatar

Some have called the bible, “a soup made from all the very best ingredients”. We are told to “rightly divide the word of truth”. The is a lot of evil illustrated in the bible, with the consequences made evident. It is actual work [ thought ] to sort out.

Far too many project our paradigm [ s ] back upon the original readers [ or hearers ] of these teachings, apparently because they are so damned [ unbelievably ] smart that they have no apparent [ to themselves ] of improving themselves.

messianicdruid's avatar

IOW - a soup with bones.

messianicdruid's avatar

To answer: it is like me picking a writing tool out of my collection of unsharpened pencils, empty pens, colored pencils, magic markers, crayons, whatever is available. The Creator uses writers [ like us - imperfect ] generally, but an ass when its all there is.

Andrew Schwartz, PT, DPT's avatar

Yes, you are correct that God told Moses (likely the author of Genesis and the rest of the Torah) that He created man and woman in the Imago Dei (Genesis 1:27 and again at the end of Genesis 2). However, in Genesis 3, this man and woman fell into deception and performed the original sin, allowing sin and brokenness to pervade the Earth and the human and animal inhabitants. Since then, the default for human beings is to be broken, poor, lost, and oppressed; physically, mentally, emotionally, etc. since then there has only been one human who was as God intended and he was both fully God and man. Beyond that, there seems to be many alterations on the original design (see Nephilim, Klinefelter syndrome, etc.). God’s truth does not change, but we humans (and animals) do. For someone to feel that their genetic make-up is at odds with their mindset and identity is one example of this brokenness, as are the malice, ostracization, condemnation, etc. that others express to these people.

Paul Crenshaw's avatar

Warning. You get one.

Stacey's avatar

I think my favourite is the moving uterus. I use that as an excuse now. 'Oh sorry. I don't think I can make it to the party you invited me to because my uterus is moving and I just don't feel up to it.' 😆

Paul Crenshaw's avatar

I am crying over here <3

Joan Crenshaw's avatar

Let me know if you get away with it? It’s worth a shot.

Gérard Mclean's avatar

That kicker. But, man I am tired. I’m tired of having to keep living these cycles of stupid over and over like a never ending Groundhog Day. When is it ok to just retreat and leave, knowing that you’re just gonna live another pointless, disappointing cycle if you stay in the game?! Anyway, good luck getting older…

Laury Boone Browning's avatar

It's tricky to do delightful and devastating simultaneously. So much of this resonates because it's straight up true, and also because of my personal history. Restacked and commented.

Holly Starley's avatar

Yes, delightful and devastating captures this well. and it’s a tricky combo indeed.

Ally Hamilton's avatar

Honestly did not even know which lines to highlight and share because this is so fucking good.

Laury Boone Browning's avatar

I had the same problem!

Naked Apes's avatar

Q4 2024 has been very bad both far and near to home. Finding kindred spirits helps balance the scales. Thanks for taking the time to write and share. We know, from history, how it ended for small men in power before...... this time the health of the entire biosphere is on table so I don't know. Going to go think about carrots and propaganda.

Paul Crenshaw's avatar

Appreciate the read.

Alisa Dee's avatar

Damn, my heart leapt to read this. I am a stupidly optimistic person that just wants to believe we can all pull together for something better. To say these last years,and this last election have been crushing would be an understatement. You keep writing such bangers and I might just keep hoping. Thank you.

In The Zone with Kartika Damon's avatar

Reading and writing can be glorious!

Thomas Stark's avatar

Forgive me if this was already posted but on my phone I’m not seeing other replies. I’m a “seasoned “ surgeon still in practice. I’ve seen old ads showing docs promote a brand of cigarettes more soothing for the throat. But what I really wanted to say is that removal of a uterus has been called a HYSTERectomy for over 100 years AS A MEANS OF REMOVING HYSTERIA from women

PattiT's avatar

Well, that sure didn’t work. My hysteria is intact. Should have come up with a better name.

Suzanne Tollefson's avatar

This is why literal rocket scientists at NASA asked Sally Ride if 100 tampons would be enough for the week she was going to spend in space.

Tim Byers's avatar

Fitting to see Reagan make the list twice: smoking and trickle down. Both cancers. Both killing us.

Momo Kron's avatar

LOVE your writing, partly because you’re putting my “inside voice” on paper. Mostly because you know your shit and can be humble and compassionate while being brilliantly funny and blunt!!

Jean wilson's avatar

Oh yes, many times over. Introvert feeling deeply but so hard to express in words, but Paul's eloquence resonates with me 100%.

Heidi in her later years's avatar

You have made my day so much brighter with this. Great read!

Jessie's avatar

WOW! Great insights Paul. 73yo Female, straight. I have a US citizen, Jewish, gay, married, step son-in-law who has two biological sons by invitro and his husband has one. They barely escaped Israel after the Hamas horror. They had previously planned on returning back to the US and already had purchased a house. I am afraid for them with Trump back in the White House.

Jason Fleming's avatar

I didn't expect "Rona Jaffe’s Mazes and Monsters" and the toboggan ride just kept getting better - thank you! 🙌

Stanley Stocker's avatar

I'm with you except for the Ouija. That shit will open up the gates of hell on your ass.

Paul Crenshaw's avatar

I dont play with that shit now, friend. I have been considering starting a D&D group just for the fellowship of it, but fuck a Ouija Board.

Stacey's avatar

DnD is amazing. I play. My dudes are awesome.