10 Comments

Thank you for lovely and vulnerable writing. Thank you for trusting us. Thank you for sharing.

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Fucking incandescent. Full stop. 💜

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Sep 24Liked by Paul Crenshaw

Thank you for being deeply you.

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Oh Hun, deep breaths. Try not to dabble in anticipatory grief. All it does is rob the joy from today. I have 42 scars as of my husband's last tally. I think of them as tattoos with stories. Momento Mori of times I didn't die.

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* sitting in the silence with Paul*

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Thank you for sharing this. Different circumstances for each of us, but that sometimes feeling of coming apart at the seams is relatable. ♥️

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Paul, I feel honored and privileged to read this. Thank you doesn't seem to suffice. The intimacy with which you share is stunning. I am grateful.

You've got me thinking today about my own scars - one from an emergency cesarean, another set directly above from my hysterectomy.

The unseaming...yes.

I've felt these last few years, after making my foray into midlife, that everything has been an unraveling.

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I get it. 14 years in. Back on chemo. Nothing else works. But I’m remarkably calm.

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author

I’m so sorry. Wishing you strength, and more calm <3

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Hang in there bud. "I ate a vegetable the other day" Early sobriety isn't a cake walk, add cancer to the mix and the mind is a minefield. It's worth it to stick and stay. I promise you that. I've been evicted, had my heart broken, been hospitalized and near death in sobriety. I've also developed deep friendships, been in love & loved twice, come to be able to sit with myself without distraction, bought a coop I can care for my mom in and loved so so many critters, even getting to work with them on a farm. Stick and stay. I believe in you. And I love railroad tracks. If you're ever in NYC, I'll show you the way into the underground Amtrak train tracks I discovered, walked and photographed.

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